Calibrating the State

"Many a false step is made by standing still." - Chinese Proverb

Calibration is the NLP word that means recognizing when people are in different states. This is a skill that we all have and use in our everyday lives, and one that's well worth developing and refining.

You distinguish the subtly different expressions as others experience different memories, and different states. For example, when someone remembers a frightening experience, his lips may become thinner, his skin Taylor and his breathing shallower.

Whereas when he remembers a pleasurable experience, his lips are likely to be fuller, the skin color more flushed and his breathing will be deeper, with softening of the facial muscles.

Often are calibration is so poor that we only notice someone is upset when he starts to cry. We rely too much on people telling us verbally how they feel, instead of using our eyes and ears. We don't want to calibrate from a punch on the nose to know that the person is angry; nor do we want to hallucinate all sorts of possibilities from a twitch of an eyebrow.

There's an exercise in NLP training that you may like to try with a friend. Ask your friend to think of the person he likes very much. As he does this, notice his eye position, and the angle of his head.

Also notice his breathing, is it deep or shallow, fast or slow, high or low? Notice too the difference in facial muscle tone, skin color, lip size and tone of voice.

Pay attention to the subtle signs that are normally disregarded. They are the outward expression of inner thoughts. They are those thoughts in the physical dimension.

Now, ask your friend to think of someone he dislikes. Notice the difference in these signs. Ask your friend to think of one, than the other, until you are sure you can detect the differences in his physiology.

In NLP terms, you have now calibrated these two states of mind. You know what they look like. Ask your friend to think of one of the people, but without telling you which one. You'll know which one it is by reading the physical cues you've already identified.

It will seem as if you have the ability to read minds...

This is a skill that can be refined. We have a tendency to calibrate unconsciously. For example, if you ask a loved one whether he or she would like to go out for a meal, you will know intuitively, immediately, before they open their mouth what the answer will be.

The "yes" or "no" is the very last step in the thought process. We can't help but respond with body, mind and language because of the deep connection between the three.

You may have had the experience of talking to someone in getting an intuition that he or she was lying. You have probably calibrated this unconsciously, and you got the feeling without knowing why. The more you practice calibration, the better you will become adept. Some differences between states will be slight, and some will be unmistakable.

As you practice, subtle changes will become easier to detect. The changes, no matter how small, were always there. As your senses become sharper you'll be able to detect them with greater precision.

Master yourself, master your world - the Best is yet to come!

David Martin.
Answer Concepts, S.A.
answerconcepts@msn.com